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| Taking a break from the water |
What a beautiful day: 80° and sunny, just enough of a breeze to cool you from the heat. My kids are loving life in the pool, and playing nicely. Together. (God does perform miracles every day!) Bennett's heart is doing well and we don't need to get him checked for another year. My dad is starting to feel better. My daughter told me I look amazing in my swimsuit before we got to the pool (which was an ego boost to this momma since I was feeling a little self conscious today; I mean, having 3 kids in 4 years will not do nice things to your body...). God continues to show me His faithfulness through the little things in each day. And finally, finally, I'm starting to notice...
I recently started reading the book "Anything" by Jennie Allen. There's been an online study, which has been helping to open my eyes as well. I've always known that I believed in God and loved Jesus and what He did for me. But even through all of that, I never felt especially close to him. I hear all of these amazing stories of how Jesus has changed people and how they are now "all in" for him. I have to admit, I have salvation envy.
I should just be grateful- I grew up in a very happy home, knowing nothing but love and support from my parents and not wanting in anything. We went to church regularly, at least when I was younger (before the church we went to soured my family, but that's another story). Even when we didn't go to church, my parents demonstrated Jesus every day by helping and loving others. They made me strive to be better, and reeled me back when I got too arrogant. They taught me to keep my mind and heart open to others, something I've tried to bring with me throughout my life. However, it wasn't until college that I learned about having a relationship with Jesus. Since then, (so for 14 years now... ugh) I've been trying to figure out what this means to me. This led me to "Anything."
I've only finished week 5, but I've learned that going all in for God doesn't mean I have to sell all of my possessions and move to Africa- though that is one way to do it. For me, it could mean going into each day thankful and praising Him, and living for His glory in all I do. Even the "mundane" things. Being thankful for the season I'm in- endless piles of dishes and clothes that need to be cleaned; taxiing my kids to and from activities; working at night so I can see my family during the day. I wanted my "Anything" to be a big, life-changing event, but what if it isn't supposed to be?
I'm working on being content in my life, and what a better way to start than to accept my Jesus story and to be proud of it? No more salvation envy. No more wanting the American dream. I'm going to wake up every morning thankful for this ridiculously blessed life I have and live that thankfulness out in every part of my life. I'm going to keep striving for a stronger relationship with God and Jesus, and determining what else my "Anything" means. I'm going to start talking to my husband to see what our "Anything" is together. I'm going to help my kids find out what it means to them. I'm going to be okay with giving things up in this world so I can focus on my forever future in heaven. Maybe my life-changing event is simply finally being thankful for what I have and strengthening my relationship with God. And that is okay.
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| Decorating some cookies after a swim- STILL getting along! |
