Why Can't We All Just Get Along?

 Can I just start by saying how happy I am that November 9th is only a week away? I have been avoiding writing this for weeks, but God put it on my heart to say something today. This election season has made my heart ache. I have seen relationships fractured, even broken because of differences of opinion and our inability to have compassion for others. There is very little attempt to understand other points of view and my Facebook and Twitter feeds have been full of anger, disdain and vitriol.  I read terms like "libtard" and "wingnut." I see people for whom I care deeply saying things meant to offend and hurt an entire group of people. Oftentimes, I am a part of said group without that person's knowledge. I know these people, I've seen their hearts, and mine is broken by the language that is spewed. We forget that words cannot be unsaid. They can be forgiven, but the scars will still remain.

I have refrained from posting anything political this season not because I am ashamed of what I believe or care about what other people think or am unwilling to stand up for my beliefs. (If any of you know me, you know that I stand strongly by my convictions and tend to have a pretty big mouth...) I have refrained solely because I don't think my heart can handle the backlash I would receive. I know whatever my beliefs are, there are some in my group of friends who will disagree, and will do so vigorously and most likely unkindly. There are many who hide behind a computer screen and say things they would never dare to say face-to-face. Reading words does not make them hurt less than hearing them; in fact, I think it makes them hurt more because (if you're like me) you can return and read them over and over, hoping you read them wrong the first 30 times.

I love this country because we are able to all have differing beliefs and will not be persecuted for thinking for ourselves. And I love that we have the First Amendment and the right to free speech, meaning we will not be prosecuted for saying or writing things that others may disagree with. I think, however, that many people misunderstand what this actually means. The First Amendment does not mean you can say whatever you want without consequences- these are real people with real feelings. I understand political correctness has gotten out of hand, but I believe the opposite is true as well and people have gone to the extreme of having no tact or concern for others.

 I don't understand how we got to this place. Can someone tell me if it has ever worked to bully someone into the same opinion? I belong to a group on Facebook that is very diverse- many of us have very differing opinions and are strong, loud women who are not afraid to share what we are thinking. The part I love best about this group is that we are able to have respectful conversations about many controversial things- politics, homosexuality and the church, etc. And if someone starts getting disrespectful or mean (often unintentionally because we are all just very passionate), there is always another person who is brave enough to call them out with love and turn the conversation back.

No one will EVER have the exact same opinion as me on everything, and for that I am grateful. Differing opinions help us to see the whole picture and decide for ourselves what we want to believe. And opinions can evolve over time as circumstances and events affect us and our outlook on life. But never once in my life have I changed my mind because someone told me my belief or the group with whom I identify was stupid. The apostle Paul says it well in Romans 15:7 (NLT), "Therefore, accept each other just as Christ has accepted you so that God will be given glory." In that same passage, in verse 14, he also says to admonish one another. Admonish; dictionary.com defines this word as: to reprove or scold, especially in a mild and good-willed manner. So Paul tells us that it is okay to disagree with someone and to teach them the truth, but to do so in a kind and loving manner. Many of you know how much I admire Jen Hatmaker, and this past week she has been viciously attacked by people identifying as Christians for her beliefs that are decidedly different than their own. There was a great article written about her and her beliefs on this election season among other things. The hurtful, hateful things said about her and calling her Christianity into question were unnerving. My stomach actually twisted reading some of the comments. All of her statements were made out of a place of love, and that's what she was doing- loving an entire group of people who had been previously shunned by the Christian community. Because of this backlash, I had to unfollow a few writers because I could no longer take the awful things they were saying not just about Jen, but about many others.

We are called to love others where they are, even if that is a totally different universe than us. Loving others does not mean that we agree with or even condone things they are doing. It means that we understand that they too are human and sinful, just like us. I LOVE that I have a diverse group of people with whom I interact- they have shaped and molded me and gotten me to see things in ways I never would have if I stayed in the bubble of those who agree with all of my beliefs. God made us all who we are on purpose, he doesn't make mistakes. And he calls us to love each other. 1 Peter 4:8 (NLT) says, "Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins." Regardless of what we believe, other people's sins are no worse than our own. Me losing my temper and yelling at my kids is no better than someone having an affair. God has made it clear many times in the Bible that all sins are equal, and that we should take the plank out of our own eyes before commenting on the speck in our neighbor's eye (paraphrased from Matthew 7:1-5). 

I'm hoping that then end of this political season will bring an end to the disrespect others are showing toward each other, though I suspect it will not. Society has shifted so that this is the norm and that we all just need to "get over it." I continually tell my children to ask themselves four things before they say something: 
 - Is it kind/respectful?
 - Will it build that person up?
 - Is it true?
 - Is it necessary?
 If the answer is no (especially to the last question), then I tell them that they may need to rethink what they are going to say. Why can't we as adults stick to these same rules? I feel like we are making this much harder than it has to be. We need to bring a little Jesus into our every day life and stick to the Golden Rule. Why can't we all just get along, even if we disagree? I promise to be kind and respectful to each of you, even if your beliefs do not align with mine. And please, if I have ever said anything insulting or disrespectful to you, call me on it- I want to have an actual conversation where I can apologize because that is never my intent! I pray you all have a great day and PRAISE THE LORD it is almost election day!